Most people, when they think of marriage, are thinking in terms of a legal system: signing papers, witnesses, and state recognition. The Bible seems to present a different argument altogether, one where the very definition of marriage is, in essence, joining of hearts and a spiritual union. Indeed, most biblical understandings would assert that sexual union can be considered marriage before God. Let us delve into some fundamental biblical precepts that attempt to illustrate this very fact.
1. It Is a Matter of the Heart, Not a Legal Agreement
Right from the beginning, the Bible had presented marriage as an institution far beyond the individual's status in law. As it says in Genesis 2:24, NKJV:
"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."
This verse doesn't speak about any marriage certificates or ceremonies but rather to an emotional and spiritual joining of two people. Notice that the term "become one flesh" is indicative of the holy, intimate, personal union-a union independent of any external laws or legal systems.
Yahshua reinforces this in Matthew 19:4-6, NKJV, as He reaches back to this Genesis passage:
"For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."
Here, Yahshua emphasizes that it is God who joins people into marriage. It is a joining ordained by God, rather more a matter of the heart and spirit than of anything which human laws can create or take away. Marriage in God's design speaks of deep emotional bonding, not just a legal contract.
2. Marriage as a Covenant Relationship
The Bible often refers to marriage as a covenant, or a holy binding relationship amounting to more than a legally recognized association. Malachi 2:14-15 says this about marriage:
"She is your companion and your wife by covenant."
The word "covenant" in a scriptural sense is an intense, spiritual pledge-one that God Himself witnesses. It speaks in this context of friendship and loyalty, things born of the heart, not of a legality. It's a reminder that, in God's eyes, marriage is about the relationship and covenant between two people, not just their legal standing.
Paul reiterates this in Ephesians 5:31-32, NKJV, comparing marriage to Christ and his relationship with the church as such:
"For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church."
This comparison of marriage to Christ's relationship with the church underlines the spiritual nature of marriage. It is a mystery, a relationship issued from heaven, which operates on levels well beyond those comprehended in the merely human or required legally. Marriage represents something considerably more profound and spiritual.
3. Sexual Union as a Marriage
One may further observe biblical evidence for the understanding that sexual union itself constitutes a marriage-like relationship. 1 Corinthians 6:16 NKJV says:
"Do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For 'the two,' He says, 'shall become one flesh.'"
Paul here speaks literally of the act of having sex, yet there is even then an aspect in which a man who has sex outside of marriage has become "one flesh" with the other person. That is a wide principle underlying the type of unity God ordained inside of marriage; such unity consists of an act of union: sex. This act, in this view, is not merely a physical act; it is a way of binding two persons together in a deep, marriage-like relationship.
We see this idea further illustrated in Genesis 24:67 NKJV when Isaac takes Rebekah into his tent:
"Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her."
Here, there is no hint of a white wedding or any legality to it; rather Rebekah became Isaac's wife by the two coming together. Hence, in those biblical days, sexual relationship was one of the important aspects which united a husband and wife in marriage as far as God was concerned.
4. The Role of the Heart in Marriage
The Bible has made crystal clear that marriage is a matter of the heart. The license may be legal, but it is the faithfulness in an emotional and spiritual sense that really counts. This can be further elaborated with the example of Romans 7:2-3:
"For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband."
But even in acknowledging the law here, the relationship is just as important. Where there might be a marriage in law, if the heart goes astray, then the bond has been meaningfully broken. Being faithful is not merely a matter of a legalism; it's a matter of the heart.
Yahshua extends it even more in Matthew 5:27-28 NKJV:
"You have heard that it was said to those of old, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart."
The above quote is very powerful because it shows that marriage is a great deal more about the heart than the external actions of the individuals. Adultery of the heart involves lusting after someone other than your spouse, and true faithfulness in marriage is an emotional and deep one.
5. Marriage-Spirit, Not Letter of the Law
Of course, the Bible underscores that what counts is the spirit of marriage, not the mere legal details. In Romans 2:28-29 it says:
"For he is not a Jew who is one outwardly, nor is circumcision that which is outward in the flesh; but he is a Jew who is one inwardly; and circumcision is that of the heart, in the Spirit, not in the letter."
While this passage speaks to the matter of Jewish identity, certainly the principle extends to marriage. True marriage is not a matter of outward appearances or even of legal recognition, but that inward, spiritual bond that joins two individuals together. It is in the heart and spirit of the relationship that true worth lies.
The Bible says marriage is so much more than a legal contract; marriage is a heart covenant-a spiritual union that rises above human laws. From the beginning in Genesis, marriage is portrayed as joining of the hearts and bodies, a bond that God Himself is witness to and sets a seal to. Sexual intimacy also has a significant contribution to create the said union, and the Bible teaches that the heart is central to what makes a marriage real in God's eyes. It's ultimately so much more than what's recognized on paper; it's the promise of love, faithfulness, and unity before Yahvah.
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